Holiday and B-day pics

Yesterday we went to Portrait Innovations to get some holiday and 1 year photos of Jordyn taken. They are really great - and affordable, and the best part is they print your photos right then and there. No waiting 3 weeks like at other studios. Since we were all sick the past 2 weeks we were really slacking on getting our holiday cards out. Thankfully, we had them printed yesterday and sent them off in the mail by the end of the day. Before we went I had also decided to get some b-day pics of Jordyn since she was sick on her birthday. At her party she didn't want to eat a cupcake, so I brought a cake to the photo shoot hoping we'd get some good pics with frosting on her face. She didn't really want to eat it but we did get some good pics. Here are the 7 poses we picked out of 89. It was really hard to cut them down!

Birthday Girl

My sweet baby girl turned 1 year old yesterday. I simply cannot believe a whole year has gone by. It was everything I dreamed it would be and more. She is so amazing and definitely the best thing that has happened to me. She gives us all so much joy and we am so very grateful to have her in our lives.

To celebrate her birthday, both her grandmas and her Aunt Erin came to visit from NY. We went to the zoo and out to dinner to celebrate yesterday. It was her first trip to the zoo and she really liked seeing the animals - especially the monkeys. They are her favorite lately and she likes to imitate their sounds. Its pretty funny hearing a 1 year old saying "ooh ooh ooh". She got to pet some of the animals at the petting corale - I thought she would be scared but she really liked it. Here is a pic of her petting a goat.

Afterwards at the restaurant, we got her an ice cream sundae. She loved putting her hands in it, mushing it all over her face and the table like fingerpaint. Here is a photo of her just getting her hands in it...

Then we went home and opened her presents. We bought her the Anywhere Chair from Pottery Barn Kids and one of her grandmas got her the Elmo Live doll. This thing is amazing. She got tons of other toys and gifts - and Christmas is just around the corner!

Today we had a party for her at the house with some friends and family. Jordyn was a little cranky this morning so I put her down for an early nap. I woke her after 2 hours to get her dressed for her party. By then some people started to arrive. She became very clingy and wouldn't let me put her down or go to anyone - not even her daddy. At first I thought all the people freaked her out, but that usually doesn't bother her. Then her triplet friends arrived and she didn't even want to play with them. I thought she might be hungry so I fed her lunch. She seemed a little better but still didn't let me leave her. Then it was cupcake time. I put her in her high chair and we all sang to her, and daddy and I helped blow out her candle. She didn't want to eat her cupcake, much less touch it. She was not interested at all. So I was bummed that we didn't get a photo with frosting on her face. She then seemed even more cranky so I put her down for a nap. Over 2 hours later I went to get her and she had 102.5 fever. Her first fever ever in her life and it had to be for her birthday party. Poor thing. So I spent the rest of the day taking care of a sick baby. Her fever broke a little while ago but I am expecting it to spike during the night. I have a feeling I won't be getting much sleep :-(

So since I was dealing with Cranky McFever Pants, I didn't get any pictures of her from her party. I know others took some so I have to wait to get those. For now, here's a few more from her b-day yesterday.

Much to be Thankful For

This year I have much to be thankful for. I am thankful for my health, my husband, my family, my job (even though I hate it but in this economy I am happy to have it), my house, my dogs, and I am especially thankful for my sweet baby girl. This time last year she was in my belly, kicking away, 2 weeks from being born. And this year she was eating turkey and is getting ready to turn 1 year old!

We had a nice Thanksgiving. Our good friend came over and brought a fried turkey from a local restaurant here in town. This is the 3rd year we've done it and its become sort of a tradition. We look forward to that delicious turkey every year. I made all the sides and dessert - even though I didn't cook the turkey I was still cooking and prepping for 2 1/2 days! And then we eat and its all over in 10 minutes. Now I am relaxing on the couch, watching the Texas Longhorns game on TV while my husband and his friend are at the game. I am awesome because I got them the tickets.

Our meal was so good, I thought I'd share some photos. I don't have the best camera for food images, but you get the idea. I am getting hungry again looking at these!

yummy fried turkey from Hoover's in Austin. I must say, I did a fine job carving it and plating it!

squash casserole - I opted for this instead of the green bean casserole. It was really yummy - the top crust is crushed ritz crackers and cheddar cheese!

cornbread and sausage stuffing

The spread - this photo has my favorite sweet potato with toasted marshmallow

Jordyn enjoying her first Thanksgiving meal

Sorry no pictures of the dessert - spiced pecan bars. By the time we ate it I had put away the camera and it didnt occur to me to take it out again. Just trust me when I say they were fabulous! Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving!

Wow, how did it already become mid-November? Wasn't it just Halloween? This month has been busy - I celebrated my 33rd birthday - my first one with Jordyn. All those years blowing out the candles and making wishes and she was finally there with me celebrating. It was the best present I could have received. I did get a new Coach bag, which was a pretty cool gift! Its purple - my favorite color!

This week Jordyn started daycare. We struggled with sending her for awhile but we finally had to give in. Our nanny found a full time position, and we couldn't afford her full time, so we had to come up with an alternative plan. Luckily we were able to find a center near the house that offered part-time programs for infants. She will go on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Tuesday went better than I expected. Jordyn is so adaptable and loves playing with other kids, and thats exactly what she did all day. Her teacher said she refused her lunch, and only napped for an hour and 15 minutes, but was happy all day. She said it will take her some time to adjust to the new schedule and new surroundings but overall she did great. I am trying to change her schedule at home too so everything can be a little more streamlined. Today I gave her a sippy cup with milk along with her lunch around 1145. She used to get a bottle of formula at 1130 and then her lunch at 1230. But she's almost a year and we are transitioning from formula since she is getting all her nutrition from food. She did well with the change, so we'll see how it continues to go. I think she is getting great care there so I am happy about that. And I didn't even cry when I dropped her off. Yay for me!

The big birthday is coming up soon - on 12/6. We are having a party on the 7th at the house - I am really looking forward to it. I still cannot believe she is going to be 1!!

Happy Halloween

Jordyn had a great first Halloween. Its hard to believe this time last year she was still in my belly! Where has this year gone??

5 years

Today I am celebrating 5 years since my kidney transplant. I can't believe its been this long already. Sometimes I feel like it was just yesterday and other times it feels like a lifetime ago. Thankfully everything is great - all my lab work checked out fine and everything is within normal range. I feel great, and have my sweet baby girl, wonderful husband and family - life is good!!

Wordless Wednesday - Livestrong Challenge

This past Saturday we participated in the Livestrong Challenge 5k. Here's a family pic in front of the state capitol after we finished the race.

Falling off the Wagon

One of the things I had a hard time with after Jordyn was born was losing weight. I gained 32 pounds during my pregnancy, and probably had another 20 or so to lose aside from the pregnancy weight. I had a c-section and a long recovery. I couldn't take normal anti-inflammatory meds like Ibuprofen because of my transplant. So I was on Vicodin for a few weeks and then only Tylenol. I also had some leftover placental tissue so I was bleeding for weeks afterwards. I didn't finally start feeling better until Jordyn was 12 weeks old. Once I started feeling like myself again I decided to tackle the weight issue. I joined Weight Watchers in April and by September I had lost all the baby weight plus 10 pounds. I was so good about counting my points. For me, the best thing about WW was that I could eat whatever I wanted - every food had a points value. So every so often I'd indulge and not feel bad about it.

In September I had a really hectic month. I had a huge event for work (that I bitched about here on this blog) and I was really stressed out. I was out of town for a week in Charleston, SC and they have the most amazing food. Of course when you are on business entertaining clients, all your meals are out at these fabulous restaurants, and well, lets just say the points took a back burner. When I came back I was good, but couldn't get back on the points. Its been a month now and I need to get motivated again. I've gained only 2 pounds but I feel like a huge cow. This week I had planned to get back on the program and today started out so great. By late afternoon the veggie chips were calling my name for a salty craving as well as the mac n cheese we had for dinner. Then the last piece of the ridiculously decadent pecan pie in the fridge practically made its way down my throat.

Bottom line is I feel guilty. The program worked for me and I need to get back on the wagon. I bought smaller sized jeans - the first in years - so I want to be able to still wear them. I really need some motivation. Something that doesn't come with a chocolatey, salty, sweet yummy flavor.

Sweet Angels

Today is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day. I feel fortunate to have my sweet baby girl and today Jordyn and I share our thoughts and prayers with the families of each of these angels who are no longer with us...

Tyler
Henry
Sam
Jack
Kinsey
Ryan
Isaac

For all the other families who have had their babies taken away too soon, I wish you love, hope and peace.

A Date with a Big Orange Jug

This month marks a big milestone - 5 years since my kidney transplant. October 30 is the official day... but I have to do some things leading up to it. Every other month I get routine bloodwork to make sure things are normal. Once a year in October I have to go through a battery of tests to confirm everything is still working fine. Tons of bloodwork, chest xray, EKG, and my personal favorite, the 24 hour urine test. Basically, you have to collect all your urine into a big orange jug over a 24 hour period. You also have to keep it in the fridge, so it always makes for a good joke or two in my house. I've probably done at least 10 over the past 7 years - a bunch as they were trying to diagnose my condition, and then once a year since the transplant. Aside from the obvious annoyance in having to literally pee in a jug, it confines me to the house all day. Unless I try to be daring and head out in between trips to the bathroom. But my mind always gets to me and 10 minutes after I leave the house my bladder starts playing tricks on me. One time it was so bad I didn't think I was going to make it. So now, I just suck it up for the day and stay inside for a long date with my jug.

Six Days

Last week I had to spend 6 days away from Jordyn. It was very hard, but I survived, and more importantly, she was happy and well taken care of when I was gone. I was in Charleston, SC for an event that I had been planning since I came back from maternity leave at the end of April. It's the same event I was bitching about in a prior post, but thankfully, it all worked out and was very successful. I actually managed to have some fun too. I ate a TON of good food - Charleston has some pretty amazing cuisine - had lots of drinks, got a massage and shopped. I would have liked to explore the city a little more, but the one afternoon where I had a chunk of free time, it was pouring, and I didn't want to take a historical carriage ride in the rain. I arrived back home on Friday late afternoon and I swear, Jordyn changed in the 6 days I was gone. She looked so grown up! She is going to be 10 months on Monday - where did the time go??

We had a busy weekend - we went to the Longhorns game on Saturday and then went to ACL Festival. This is the first year I haven't had to work the event, and actually got to relax!! My company is a sponsor of the festival and we have had one of the premier stages for the last few years. I used to be on the sponsorship team and I was responsible for the backstage hospitality area. Tons of fun, sure, but dealing with high maintenance execs who want their Red Bull and Vodka ASAP, not so much. Luckily the people in charge now were nice enough to give me backstage passes, and I scored a parking pass from one of the organizers, so we were able to go at our leisure and have fun. We also spent most of the day there on Sunday - the Raconteurs and the Foo Fighters were definitely the highlights! Jordyn was home with the nanny - I hated leaving her again, but a loud, HOT outdoor festival in a dusty park was no place for a baby. Many others disagreed with my rationale - I saw plenty of infants younger than Jordyn there. I just don't get why someone would bring their baby. But I digress.

Back to the grind at work. Last week showed me I could have balance, but now that I am back I am wishing I was home with Jordyn all the time.

Wordless Wednesday - Big Girl!

Wordless Wednesday - Daddy Love

No further description needed. This picture is worth a thousand words...

Pink Rose Award

“Give the Pink Rose Award to those who inspire you or need to be inspired, to those who have encouraged you or those who need encouragement.”





The Pink Rose Award was given to me by Monica H at STILL HOPEFUL. I was touched by this gift, especially since she is the one who has touched me with her stories of her boys, and the strength and courage she has shown during her few last painful years. Monica, I truly believe you will get your happy ending, whatever that may be.

She asked that I also give this award to someone deserving. Since I am new to the blogosphere, I will give this award to 2 women who have inspired me with their stories. First to Larisa - reading your infertility story in the local paper got me started on reading blogs. Our infertility journeys were so similar, and it was comforting to me to know someone else out there was going through the same thing. You got pregnant right after I did and I followed your entire pregnancy on your blog. Elodie was born a month and a day after Jordyn and from viewing your photos and videos from her birth, I realized you were in the same mother/baby room that Jordyn and I were in - Room 213. I am happy that we both conquered our infertility together and have our beautiful little girls.


Next, I am giving this award to Jamie who also went through a parallel pregnancy journey. Her sweet Bo was born 2 weeks before Jordyn and I've enjoyed following along with his growth and development. I look forward to Jamie's blogs about Bo's food, activities, teeth, and she has been a tremendous help when I've had questions about schedules, feedings, etc. She also is a fabulous baker and I can't wait to make her French Silk Pie.


Thank you Monica, Larisa and Jamie for inspiring me with your stories, and for all the strength and encouragement you have all given me. Even if you didn't know it, you were all there when I needed you at different times and for that I thank you.


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1. On your blog, copy and paste the award, these rules, a link back to the person who selected you, and a link to this post: http://smartone.typepad.com/smartone/2008/05/pink-is-my-favo.html. You will find the story behind the Pink Rose Award and other graphics to choose from there.
2. Select as many award recipients as you would like, link to their blogs (if they have one), and explain why you have chosen them.
3. Let them know that you have selected them for an award by commenting on one of their posts.
4. If you are selected, pass it on by giving the Pink Rose Award to others.
5. If you find that someone you want to nominate has already been selected by someone else, you can still honor them by posting a comment on their award post stating your reasons for wishing to grant them the award.
6. You do not have to wait until someone nominates you to nominate someone else.

9 months

My sweet Jordyn is 9 months today. Where has the time gone? Here is a pic of her when she was less than one day old, followed by a pic from this evening.

Sweet baby, please don't grow up too fast. You are changing every day and I want to cherish every moment...

Frustration with Corporate America

I hate corporate America. After working in it for 10 years, each day I realize more and more how much I hate it. Its all about putting money in the head guy's pocket and not caring about the hard working employees who make the company successful. Decisions are made for the wrong reasons, without thinking of the consequences. And I've just about had it.

I have been working on this huge event for months. 67 guests are confirmed and others still pending. It is scheduled to take place in 2 and a half weeks. I have put my heart and soul into this event. I spent 2 weekends away from my baby to ensure the event would be perfect. I was informed today that the event might be canceled because the execs didn't think it would be "fiscally responsible" for us to hold it given our financial situation. Since we are within 90 days we are still on the hook for the full amount. 200k. They are debating what they want to do. Hello?? Are you there?? DUH?!? This should be a no brainer. You still have to pay the full amount. Doesn't it make sense to still hold the event?? I just don't see the logic in canceling an event where you still have to pay the full amount. How is THAT fiscally responsible?

I just don't get it. And I don't think I ever will. I am so over Corporate America...

Wordless Wednesday - bubbles

Jordyn was introduced to bubbles at Gymboree and loves them. Of course I bought the same ones so now we can have bubble time at home too!

Wordless Wednesday - swimming

Someone just loves her swim lessons!

Milestones

Jordyn has changed so much these last few weeks. We came back from NY on 7/29 and I feel like she has done so much since then. She started swim lessons 2 weeks ago and is definitely a little fish. Maybe she'll be in the Olympics one day breaking Michael Phelps' new record! Its so great to see her in the water, learning new things and socializing with other kids. I also took her to Gymboree a few times and will continue to take her weekly. On Saturday she had her first forward crawling motion while we were there. I was so amazed! I enticed her with a toy of course, but she was so determined to move forward and get it, and she did it! I was so proud of her! Then yesterday, she said her first word: mama. Of course, I don't think she's saying it for me specifically yet, but I love to hear her say it. "Mamama, mama" - she says it all day. Of course Daddy is jealous but she'll be saying dada soon enough.

Last night for dinner I gave her little pieces of chicken for the first time. She did great - chewed each little piece and didn't even gag! That's been an issue - sometimes she gags so bad her whole dinner comes up. Thankfully she kept it down and seemed to enjoy it. This past week she's also had diced up pears, cheerios, yogurt and Gerber puffs. Her spit up problem is much better, but she'll still bring up something with a burp every now and then, usually right after a bottle. Occasionally when she's playing on the floor something chunky will come up, and now that she has some yogurt in her system it stinks. Ugh, love regurgitated whole milk products. :-)

The Work Blues

When I was in high school, all I wanted for my future was to have a career. I was so anti-stay-at-home-mom and anti-wife taking care of husband that all I could think about was college and my future. I think its because my mom was a SAHM, although she did work in my father's pharmacy after all us kids were in school. It also didn't help that my dad (may he now rest in peace) was the type of husband who came home from work and expected dinner ready, and everyone to wait on him. "I need fluids" is one of my favorites. Um, hello, get up and get yourself a drink. I swore I would I would take care of myself and never have to have a man provide for me. I did that. I went to college. Moved to Austin to be with my honey. Got a job right away. Then when honey and I broke up, an opportunity came my way that I couldnt pass up. I moved across the country to San Francisco knowing almost no one and immersed myself in work. I then was able to move to Boston with the same company to start a branch of the company there. Then honey and I got back together and I moved back to Austin, got married, got a job at big computer company, hated it and then found another job in technology and have been here for 8 years. I worked hard, got promoted, had fun and then got in a rut. My priorities changed. I started to care less about work and more about having a family.

Hello, infertility. It consumed me for 7 years. Work was still there but all I could think about was this sweet little baby I may or may not have. When I was diagnosed with a kidney disease and found out I needed to have a transplant, my dreams of baby were put on hold. So I focused on work again. Moved to a new group in the company and had the best 3 years of work ever. Got to travel, do new and fun things, challenge myself, and work with one of the legends in the sports world. Then started fertility treatments and it consumed me again. Things at work were changing. Fun job was being eliminated, and boss did everything she could to get herself promoted, and those 3 years of the best and hardest work I ever did went unrewarded. F-in corporate America.

Then it happened. IUI finally worked and I was pregnant!! I had the most wonderful pregnancy and it resulted in the most amazing, sweet and beautiful little girl - who is 8 months old today, BTW. Where does the time go? But I digress. I had an extended maternity leave combined with a sabbatical from work. After 5 months, I went back to work. Luckily I was able to swing it so I am only in the office 3 days, and work from home 2 days. On the days when I work in the office, hubby watches her one day and we have a nanny for the other 2. Its working out well, and I'll post about the nanny some other time. She's good but I have my issues with her. Many people say I am so lucky because of the work situation I have. I know I am. But here's the thing - I could care less about work. I loathe it. There are aspects of my job that I really like, but overall, I am less than thrilled with the company right now, have no interest in learning about new products, and generally just don't want to be here. I need the job because I need the money. I like my house, my car, and occasionally getting a pedi or buying something nice. But is it all worth it? I feel like I am missing things with the baby because I am not with her all the time. Its total mommy guilt. Some days I am OK and others I just want to quit. I just don't know how to balance it all, but the main problem is I just don't want to.

Can't I just win the lottery?

Slow start

Well, i had all good intentions of jumping into the blog world and sharing my story. Then before I knew it, this whole month has flown by and I had not written anything new!! Where has the time gone? I did just get back from almost a 2 week vacation in NY visiting family. We had a great time and took Jordyn in the ocean for the first time - she loved it! She also ate lots of sand - what child hasn't at one time or another?

Here's hoping August doesn't get away from me before I post again!

I have arrived

Reading blogs is what helped me get through it all. The infertility. The unexplained reasons why it wasnt working. The disappointment each month when it didn't work. The pain. The heartache. I felt for each of you when you experienced the same. Then the shock of a positive HPT. The disbelief when I saw the heartbeat for the first time - there really was a baby in there! The joy. The hope. The fear - please let this baby be OK after everything we have been through. The flutters. The kicks. The planning. The purchasing. The nervousness. The excitement. And finally, FINALLY... a beautiful baby.

I remember the first time I saw Jordyn for the first time. She was lifted over the "tent" placed over me during the c-section. A reddish-purple squirmy thing with a tuft of brown hair. I cried, thinking she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Now I knew what all those other mothers felt. And I was so glad to finally be feeling the same thing.

My story isn't unlike yours. There has been a lot of sadness, and finally, so much happiness. Since reading blogs helped me get through it, I hope sharing my story will help someone else. We all need as much love and support as we can find, and sometimes its easier when its virtual.

I'll share more about myself, my wonderful husband, our beautiful daughter, my family and my life as this blog progresses.